Friday, October 24, 2014

Watching from the Bench

"Give us all the juicy details."

Typical conversation a few years ago. Everyone had a boyfriend before I did. I was scared to admit that I even liked someone. It was partially because I never genuinely had feelings for a boy.

" So how far did you go?"

" Third-base."

She was the first to do it so all attention was on her that lunch. The girls expressed their concerns so they could be prepared for their encounters. While everyone was running past bases I was a home plate the entire time. I didn't even know what the bases were and to be honest I still don't understand. I had to ask my friend what third base involved because I had never heard of anything like it. When she told me I thought about puking, but it wasn't a big deal to her. I didn't want to be a part of it, but it made me feel like I was missing something. Even though I didn't have whatever they had I lived through their experiences.

"Oh God I regret getting with him so much it was terrible, but at least I got it over with."

At that point I was relieved that that uncomfortable , graphic conversation was over. She was only relieved because she finally had some experience under her belt I didn't take part in those awkward exchanges with boys who didn't know what they were doing, but for so many years I was confused and thought there was something wrong with me.

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