Preceding my shameful moment, I tried on a pair of very ill fitting, ugly jeans, something I or my mom would of never bought for me. Suddenly, while trying on these jeans I was absolutely overcome with the need, need, to pee and that's when it all happened. Standing right there in a Macy's fitting room with a pair of too big jeans on, I peed my pants. Luckily, I was still at an age where this can be condoned but the fact that the pants I peed weren't even mine was the issue. I slowly open my dressing room door and confessed to my mom what had just happened. I consider my mom to be pretty understanding and given that I was 6 or 7 years old, you would think she would be too but she knew exactly what she had to do. She now had to buy these awful pants and to prove her dismay she told the store clerk exactly why she was having to buy them. I could not of left the store fast enough as my entire soul was drenched in shame. I look back at myself now and feel more sadness for how scared and sad I was at myself but what that little 1st grader felt was the rawest sense of shame.
Friday, October 24, 2014
When I was in 1st grade my mom and I went to a department store to find some new pants since I was rapidly outgrowing mine. My mom picked out an assortment of jeans and leggings but at this point I had one thing on my mind which was a faint but growing need to pee. It was not a pressing matter though so I continued to shop until we went to the fitting rooms. As I tried on each new pair of pants the need grew more and more. At this point I look back and ask myself why I did not just ask my mom to take me to a bathroom. This is the most puzzling aspect of this story because all the horror, death, and despair that follows this event could have been spared by just telling my mom that I needed to go.