Do You Trust Me?

Browsing through the Op-Talk blog of the New York Times, I came across a post about a new app called Cuddlr, a sort of social networking app for people who want to participate in platonic cuddling, spooning, or hugging. You browse through Cuddlr profiles and request a Cuddle from people nearby and you can choose to meet in public or in private for a hug or to lie in the park and stare up at the sky. Being an optimist and a person predisposed to happiness and trust, my first thought was that this sounded like a wonderful idea. I love hugging and know that human touch is necessary in life and makes people happier and calmer.

But then I thought about the dangers of all apps and networks like Cuddlr that promote strangers meeting and trusting each other. With all of the awful things human beings have done to each other, is it any surprise that I get a sinking feeling thinking about trusting someone I have never met to hold me and hug me? What are the chances that the other person makes sexual advances? What are the chances the other person begins to stalk you after the encounter?

I don't think apps like Cuddlr are the right way for people to receive the human touch and connection that we need to live and prosper. I think it's healthier to meet friends of friends, friends of family, friends through the workplace, and begin a relationship with that person in which you can learn to trust each other. And hug the friends you already have. Why go out of your way to hug someone? Show the people you love how much you care about them with a hug. Make a lasting friendship with someone in which you are comfortable enough with each other to cuddle platonically. Because it's not just the physical hug that I think makes human touch so healing. It's what the hug says. The hug or cuddle shows how much someone cares about you. It's not just about the action. It's about someone saying, "I'm here for you. I will hug you until you get better. I will be by your side and stay close to you. I love you"